yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
