But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
