Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Randomize
