Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
