Will you blow on my dice?
Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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