i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Randomize
