He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
