Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize
