I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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