Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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