The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
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When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
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Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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