How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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