shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
