people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Randomize
