pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I am puke
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
