i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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