I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
