I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
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