you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
