is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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