I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Randomize