try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
