batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
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