they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
