Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
