I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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