How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS