using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
