I just threw up on my dentist
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
