I wish my penis had an off switch
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize