I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Randomize
