I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
