Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
