I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
