Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
