You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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