i would punch a child for taco bell
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
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