I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
i now understand why vodka
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
