he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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