i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize