Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(763): View more from Minnesota

My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.

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(763): My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats. http://tfl.nu/m7i1

Replies (1) Good night (1598) Bad night (493) Order T-Shirt
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(732): View more from New Jersey

fuck the hobbit

(301): View more from Maryland

what about unicorns?

(732): View more from New Jersey

fuck those pointy horses

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(732): fuck the hobbit (301): what about unicorns? (732): fuck those pointy horses http://tfl.nu/k7om

Replies (9) Good night (2543) Bad night (611)
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(503): View more from Oregon

Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.

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(503): Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college. http://tfl.nu/hzqm

Replies (14) Good night (5031) Bad night (924) Order T-Shirt
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(734): View more from Michigan

The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.

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(734): The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car. http://tfl.nu/l3cg

Replies (9) Good night (1286) Bad night (4549) Order T-Shirt
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(407): View more from Florida

When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.

(301): View more from Maryland

Did you reintroduce yourself?

(407): View more from Florida

He threatened to call the cops.

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(407): When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house. (301): Did you reintroduce yourself? (407): He threatened to call the cops. http://tfl.nu/0bcc

Replies (7) Good night (629) Bad night (1880)
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(850): View more from Florida

I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.

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(850): I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs. http://tfl.nu/p0c7

Replies (11) Good night (1799) Bad night (589)
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(970): View more from Colorado

The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.

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(970): The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad. http://tfl.nu/lkeb

Replies (4) Good night (913) Bad night (642)
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(302): View more from Delaware

You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.

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(302): You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English. http://tfl.nu/fod6

Replies (5) Good night (565) Bad night (1517)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.

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(610): I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city. http://tfl.nu/xrle

Replies (12) Good night (383) Bad night (1112) Order T-Shirt
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(703): View more from Virginia

I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do

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(703): I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do http://tfl.nu/cpj9

Replies (11) Good night (1100) Bad night (610) Order T-Shirt
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(505): View more from New Mexico

I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?

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(505): I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet? http://tfl.nu/aavq

Replies (9) Good night (1754) Bad night (609) Order T-Shirt
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .

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(215): So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand . http://tfl.nu/gg9e

Replies (22) Good night (950) Bad night (2638)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly

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(724): These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly http://tfl.nu/feuo

Replies (5) Good night (731) Bad night (388) Order T-Shirt
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(217): View more from Illinois

I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.

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(217): I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine. http://tfl.nu/bpq4

Replies (1) Good night (1102) Bad night (239)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.

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(304): I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here. http://tfl.nu/t14q

Replies (5) Good night (523) Bad night (160) Order T-Shirt

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