also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
