normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
