just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Randomize
