ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
