I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
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