Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
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