How'd it feel making her break her religion?
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
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