i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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