You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Randomize
